Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling

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So, you’ve come looking for funny quotes on cycling.

Maybe you want funny quotes about cycling to share with fellow riders, to post on social media, or to gift to a bicycle-obsessed someone – t-shirts, mugs, posters, or even cards!

Clever, relatable, silly. From personal experiences and bike jokes to the absurdities that every cyclist faces. More than actual quotes, we’re all about the reinvention of phrases you can either quote or reframe to match whatever you need.

Here are the 34 funniest quotes about cycling the internet has to offer!

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 1

#1. The Cyclist’s Proverb

“Give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to cycle, and he’ll realize fishing is stupid and boring.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 2

Ask other cyclists and confirm. This is an old proverb (with a slight cycling twist) from Desmond Tutu.

#2. Bike vs. Car

“Cars run on money, and make you fat. Bikes run on fat, and save you money.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 3

Cycling: it’s a thousand times better than driving. No question about it.

#3. Cycle Therapy

“Cycling is cheaper than therapy. Until you start buying bikes.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 4

A light-hearted take on the therapeutic pros of cycling.

#4. Reflective Rider

“I don’t use mirrors when cycling. I know I look good.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 5

Confidence. That’s all. Nothing else.

#5. Two-Wheeled Wisdom

“Life is like riding a bicycle. I don’t know how to do it without training wheels.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 6

A self-deprecating twist on a classic metaphor.

#6. Biker’s Tan

“Cyclists don’t tan, they rust.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 7

No matter how true this is – or if you practice nude cycling – don’t forget to wear sunscreen!

#7. Cycling Addiction

“Cycling is like coffee. You can never have too much but your doctor might disagree.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 8

Are there more addictive pleasures in life than these two? If so, drop a comment.

#8. Rider’s Reality

“You can’t buy happiness. But you can buy a bike. And that’s pretty close.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 9

Universally undeniable sentiment among cyclists.

#9. Cycle Superstition

“Never mock a cyclist’s padded shorts. Karma hits in the rear.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 10

Not-so-pacifist warning for the uninitiated.

#10. Cycling Fashion

“Cycling: the only place neon is always in fashion.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 11

Neon? Bold fashion choice. Only for cyclists.

#11. Cycling Metaphysics

“Riding a bike is as close as we get to flying. Until you hit a pothole – then you’re actually flying.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 12

The contrast between the freedom of cycling and the cold hard reality of the road.

#12. Bike Shop Blues

“Every time I walk into a bike shop, my wallet gets a flat.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 13

Anyone who’s ever invested in cycling and wondered why bikes are so expensive can relate.

#13. Bike Ride Nostalgia

“Remember when your bike was just a bike, and not a carbon-fiber alien spaceship?”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 14

For those who yearn for simpler times.

#14. Spandex Spectacle

“Spandex: the only time grown-ups can dress like superheroes and get away with it.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 15

For the superhero in every cyclist out there.

#15. Duty Calls

“I told my bike it needed a wash. It told me it needed a new rider.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 16

The heated exchange between a bike and its rider.

#16. Cycling Timing

“Apparently ‘biking time’ is not an acceptable answer to ‘What time will you be home?'”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 17

I plead guilty to losing track of time while riding. Not all bicycle quotes can be profound.

#17. Bike Binging

“Binge-watching my favorite show: the road, season forever.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 18

Writer, director, and producer. All at once.

#18. Cycling Forecast

“Today’s forecast: 100% chance of cycling.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 19

With or without cycling apps to forecast the weather, cycling is a heck-yeah – rain or shine.

#19. Chain Reaction

“I don’t have a bucket list, but my bike-it list is a mile long.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 20

One of those funny cyclist quotes we can all relate to.

#20. Bike Troubles

“My bike must think it’s a magician – it’s always trying to do tricks when I ride.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 21

Your own bicycle mishaps are also a fundamental part of the journey.

#21. Morning Ride

“I don’t need an alarm clock. My bike is my wake-up call.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 22

Early-morning riders, unfortunately, I’m not you – but I salute you.

#22. Wheel Truth

“Life’s too short for bad vibes—and flat tires.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 23

In life as in cycling, it’s all about keeping things in a good mood and moving smoothly.

#23. Cycling Retirement Plan

“My retirement plan? Cycling around the world. Or at least to the grocery store.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 24

Whether around the corner or on the other side of the globe, cycling is the answer.

#24. Cycling Anniversary

“It’s my bike’s birthday. We’re celebrating with a long ride and a new set of tires.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 25

Because as a cyclist at heart, you know your bike deserves the best.

#25. Cycle Mystery

“Why do bikes stand on their own? Because they’re two-tired.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 26

Yeah, we know. You didn’t think you would get through a whole list of funny quotes about biking without at least one dad joke, did you?

#26. Cycling Optimist

“Every climb leads to a descent. You just have to get to the top first.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 27

The hard work of cycling uphill pays off afterward.

#27. Proud Parent

“I don’t have kids, but I do have a bike. That counts, right?”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 28

Ok, it’s not the same. But I must say it does feel that way.

#28. Punctured Pride

“Pride comes before a fall… and after a flat.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 29

Ouch, the inevitable flat tire that we’ve gone through at some point.

#29. Biker’s Beauty

“Why is it that wind always feels better when you’re on a bicycle ride?”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 30

The pure joy of cycling is such an indescribable thing.

#30. Cycling Meditation

“Cycling is the best form of meditation. Unless you meditate on why your butt hurts so much.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 31

Reflection on the less-than-peaceful aspects of cycling.

#31. Cycling Solitude

“Loneliness is riding a tandem bike solo.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 32

I’m not crying, you’re crying.

#32. Cycling Realities

“I love everything about cycling – except the uphills, downhills, headwinds, and flat tires.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 33

The love-hate relationship with cycling is real. Although, the love for it is stronger.

#33. Bike Ride Buddy

“Who needs friends when you have a bike? Oh, right, someone to help fix flat tires.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 34

Priorities and practical benefits of cycling friendship have been stated.

#34. Cycling Fashion

“Cycling: the only place neon is always in fashion.”

Wits on Wheels: 34 Funny Quotes on Cycling 11

Neon? Bold fashion choice. Only for cyclists.

Enjoyed these funny quotes on cycling? Check out more from the BikeTips team below!

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Manuel is BikeTips' urban cycling aficionado. Based in Buenos Aires, he weaves his love for sustainable transportation into his cycling writing. When he's not writing for cycling publications or watching the Tour de France, you'll find him exploring the city on one of his vintage steel racing bikes.

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