Get ready to pedal through a wheelie good time as we gear up for a hilarious ride through the good, the bad, and the ugly of bike jokes!
Whether you’re a die-hard cyclist or just a two-wheeled enthusiast, these pun-tastic quips and witty one-liners will either have you groaning or rolling on the floor laughing – or at least swaying like a wobbly cyclist trying to balance for the first time.
From the dreaded uphill battles to the joys of freewheeling down a hill, we’ve rounded up the funniest moments and quirks that every cyclist can relate to.
So, put on your spandex, grab your helmet, and hop on your trusty steed (or rusty old bike, we won’t judge) as we take a leisurely stroll through the world of bicycle jokes.
These bike jokes are like a well-oiled chain – they’ll keep you entertained, no matter how many miles you’ve clocked on your bike.
Without further ado, let’s kick off this cycling jokes journey on two wheels!
#1. Pedaling Poetry
Roses are red, bikes are two-wheeled.
My rhyming needs work, let’s go biking in a field.
#2. Science of Cycling
Why don’t scientists trust atoms that cycle?
Because they make up everything!
#3. Fitness Fanatic
My favorite cool-down exercise after a ride is a cross between a lunge and a crunch.
It’s called “lunch“.
#4. Ghost Rider
Why couldn’t the old bike find its way home?
It lost its bearings.
#5. Saddle Sore
Finding the right bicycle seat is a real pain in the butt. Literally.
#6. False friends
My biking buddy keeps leading me down trails that could kill me.
He’s a real cycle-path!
#7. The Biking Botanist
What do you get when you cross a bicycle and a flower?
#8. Braving the Elements
What do you call a bicycle that’s been left out in the rain?
#9. Clout Chaser
I told my family I won my race this weekend.
They told me to stop pedaling lies.
#10. Friend of the Earth
I’ve been riding a terrible bike I found at the junkyard for years.
I’m a committed re-cycler!
#11. Bicycle Beats
What’s a bicycle’s favorite type of music?
#12. Rider Ruminations
Life is like a 10-speed bicycle…
Most of us have gears we never use.
#13. Cyborg Cyclist
I ride an electric bike.
Some cycling snobs find me a little bit re-volt-ing.
#14. Survival of the Fittest
They say only the fittest survive.
If that were true, all cyclists would be immortal!
#15. Law of Biking
Biking uphill is like paying taxes.
Going downhill is the refund that never feels as good as the pain.
#16. Crashing In
If I had a dollar for every time I fell off my bike in the past year, I’d have three dollars – which isn’t much, but it still sucks that it happened three times.
Why did the cyclist go to therapy?
He was dealing with cycle-logical issues.
#18. Biking Banker
The banker is an expert cyclist.
He knows all there is to know about balance!
#19. Roadside Regrets
The destination isn’t what matters, it’s the journey…
Unless you forgot the map.
#20. Biker Buzz
Why do cyclists get drunk so easily?
They can’t handle bars!
#21. Pressure problems
My tires blew out on the last lap of my race.
I guess they couldn’t handle the pressure!
#22. The Silent Treatment
I think my old bike is angry with me.
I bought another one, and now it hasn’t spoke-n to me in weeks!
#23. Cycling Scholar
Why do bikes do well in school?
They’re always up for new spin-formation!
#24. Religious Rider
I started a cycling group at my church. We’re called the Holy Rollers.
#25. Cycling Cheat
What did the hungry lions say after the man escaped on his bike?
“What a cheat-ah!“
#26. Noble Knight
I consider myself something of a knight on my bike.
I joust with traffic every day!
#27. Tandem Travails
Riding a tandem bike is all about coordination and communication. And apologies. Lots of them.
#28. Weight Weenies
I told my bike it needed to lose some weight.
It didn’t take it very wheel.
#29. Security Lapse
A bike carries you forward.
Unless you forgot to lock it up. Then it carries someone else forward.
#30. Heavy Metal
Heavy metal bands have a lot in common with my bike.
Both make lots of noise, get through too many chains, and could probably do with a wash.
#31. Psychic Cyclist
Why did the psychic refuse to ride her bike?
She had a bad case of cycle-ic vision!
#32. The Braking Bookworm
My bike is addicted to reading about brakes – but it’s trying to stop!